Monday, June 20, 2011

Things I can't wait for

In two days I will be officially 40 weeks pregnant. The wait for our little baby to come seems so endless! I find myself thinking sentimental thoughts like these:

"The next time I blow dry my hair I might be getting ready to come home from the hospital."
"I wonder if I'll get to sleep through the night again."
"The next time I see this person, they'll probably be visiting us in the hospital."

Needless to say, it's been very hard to be patient.

Last week felt like it should have been divided over two or three--we have been so busy getting everything ready for our baby! On Monday the crib arrived. On Monday night and Tuesday morning we painted the dresser and set up the crib. I spent a good deal of Wednesday folding his clothes and putting them in his dresser, and on Wednesday night we went shopping for a lot of last minute items. On Thursday, I got into a bit of a crafting spree and began making several decorations for his room. I didn't finish until Friday, and they all turned out perfectly (though I'm not biased). Pictures will soon follow, I assure you.

With that side of baby business is over, it feels like he should be here already. Tyler and I have made a beautiful space in our home and hearts for Noah to come, and until he comes, it feels like something is missing. While we've been crossing our fingers and waiting, I've had a bit of time to think about what it will be like with him here. I can't wait for some of these imaginings to become reality:

Holding our baby and watching him see the world for the first time
Feeling his fingers wrapped around my hand
Putting him in the car to take him home
Spending the first night with him in our house--waking up every three hours and all
Seeing my husband hold him and love him
Knowing just how to soothe his cries
Putting baby lotion on him--I love the smell of baby lotion...

And yes, there are some more selfish things I can't wait for as well:
Being able to fit in more than just my five maternity shirts
Turning over in my sleep without the great fuss of adjusting pillows, heaving my watermelon-belly over, and wincing as my hips pop and rub against each other
No more Prilosec
Going for a shopping trip without becoming exhausted after the first store
Going out in public without the eternal stream of "You look like you're about to pop!" comments.

There's one more thing that I can't express in a simple sentence. I have a few friends who had babies in the last year, and every Sunday I had opportunities to sit with them in church and watch their babies play. For awhile I was entranced just by the infants--their movements, the way they looked at me, their smiles and their joy. Over time, though, I found the pure relationship between my friends and their babies even more fascinating. I began to notice the way they would glance back and forth between their mothers and their toys, as if wanting to know what Mother thought of their activities. I saw them set forth on their own to chase a ball or to explore a stranger's purse, only to return speedily to give their mom a wide grin and wait for her reaction. And every time my friends picked up their babies, they knew just how to hold them, how to tickle and tease them, how to coax expressions of the purest joy onto their faces. No matter how often I held their babies, I could never make such happiness come. I've learned that it is something that only comes with being a parent to your own child. And that made me want to be the Mommy more than anything else.

Pics of the nursery coming soon....hopefully along with pictures of the little prince himself!